Ashes to ashes

Innkeepers - The Drunken Goat
aka Dale the Kobold God

After finding out that their friend, Rummel, has passed away, the party gathered to hear what he had left in his will. To their outmost surprise and joy, they were left the ruined broken  lovely inn "The Drunken Goat". After kicking out a few troublemakers and hiring a cook, the party set out to find that most important of life essences – booze.

They made their way to the village of Smallbell, with a little stop which got a very unlucky bandit slaughtered. When they arrived at Smallbell, they were told that in order for the Smallbell Brewery to be able to help them, the party needed to help Smallbell first. Clear a goblin cave, fetch enchanted water for the mead and save the prizewinning cow, Bella. The party prioritized extremely well and went after Bella.

It turned out that a tribe of kobolds had kidnapped Bella to worship her as their now goddess. The party convinced the kobolds to let her go and to worship Dale, the half-elf sorcerer, instead. The party returned with Bella and Smallbell threw a party in their honor.

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Frostlovers - The Lockbox
aka On the subject of Halflings

The party sat waiting for their contact to arrive in the little in called "Warmth". They were in the village of Frost, having been told that a lockbox had been stolen from a trade route that was meant for the Thunder Dynasty. While waiting, the party prayed to Bahamut, which was not as welcome as they would have hoped. 

Bharsh, their contact, was a very uptight and self-centered blue dragonborn who told them that they were to not, under any circumstances, open the lockbox. He also gave them a lead, Haggler. Before leaving, he was extremely rude to a halfling waitress.

The party consoled the waitress and told her that she could join them when they left Frost. They then went and bought supplies from the only store in town. It turned out that the shop owner was Haggler, he told the party about the man who had tried selling him the lockbox. After learning of the location, one of the clerics asked Bahamut for guidance. He received it, only to ruin the moment with the worst "song" ever heard.

The party traveled towards the location, happening upon a Frostwolf, but not much else happened. They are now standing outside what seems to be a bandit den, shouting for the leader to come out.

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Frostlovers - The Magician
aka How the Monsters Came to Shire

As the party stood waiting outside the cave, a large man wielding a battlehammer exited. He was followed by two henchmen. The party, as charismatic as they are, tried bargaining with nothing to get the lockbox. When they realized that they could not actually get it for free, the goliath Chief drew his blade and Hoppsan burned the three men. That's how it all started.

It ends with a strange-looking wizard popping out of nowhere, a portal behind him, blasting the large man in the chest, killing him. He stole the lockbox and ran inside the portal, followed by our heroic party. Chief, being enraged, tried headbutting the portal. He did, but he also headbutted the person who had entered the portal before him – Lia. She fell unconscious. 

They arrived at a pirate ship filled with pirates, undead pirates and a kraken. As they made their way across the ship, Lia tried swinging with a rope to cross the ship. The kraken did not approve of this, and slapped her down. 

The next place they entered was a gothic hall, filled to the brim with different kinds of monsters. They had a party, and the brave adventurers had to dodge and weave between the dancers. Some of our heroes were thrown across the hall, others had to separate werewolves making out. Such is the life of an adventurer.

When the magician had managed to open up yet another portal, our holy Lina convinced the monsters that the lockbox contained brains. They all stopped dancing, the band stopped playing, and the monsters charged after the magician and the party…

…into the Shire. This is were our brave gnome Hoppsan almost managed to catch the lockbox, but it ended in her being carried by the magician, clinging to the lockbox for dear life. Chief tried telling the monsters to go back to the party – but pointed in the wrong direction. The monsters started shuffling towards where an 111-year old had a birthday-party.

After wrestling with the gnome for the lockbox, the magician finally managed to retrieve it and ran through the last portal – and ended up back in time, just before the party entered the pirate-ship-portal. The magician called the party fools, laughed about how he had achieved his mission and disappeared in a cloud of smoke. He did not notice, however, that he dropped a key that looked eerily like a key that would fit in the lockbox…

Hoppsan cried, since loosing the lockbox was hard on her. Lia looted the bodies and found, well, perculiar things that she did not appreciate. Chief carried two of the bodies towards the cave, Mikael baptised a new believer of Bahamut and gave him the name Kent. They soon noticed that an avalance, caused by the large man who got blasted to hell, were descending down upon them. They hurried inside the cave, where Chief managed to prop the entrance full with tents while Mikael and Lina, with the help of Kent, built a shrine to Bahamut. 

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Innkeepers - Shitsticks and Goblin Burritos
aka The Day The Barbarian Missed EVERYTHING

After enjoying a mead-feast in their honor, the party went to bed. After being rudely awoken by Elder Martin, who insisted that the party should hurry up and go adventuring, they feasted on some mead-cakes with mead and mead-jam. They also decided that it was time to fetch the enchanted water that they had been tasked to do. After questioning Elder Martin about where the water is, he told them that Alenn knew, and that he could show them.

The party found Alenn, who fetched himself a book and a few sandwiches before departure. They then decided to make a detour and fix the goblin problem – probably by slaying them all. Alenn showed the way to the goblin den and decided to read his novel while waiting. 

The party entered the den, and was immediately  set upon by goblins and bugbears. To sum up the fight:
Dale casts spells! No Wild Magic since no fun allowed, apparently.
Tesla tells everyone that they're doing an a-ok job!
Balsa gently asks every enemy to reform to Bahamut while slaughtering them in the name of Bahamut.
Drusilla critfails, critfails, critfails. 

They managed to knock out a goblin, and then persuade him to tell them the whereabouts of the other goblins, and so he did. They then left him tied up, like a goblin burrito. A single tear was shed.



After making their way towards the kitchen, the party found themselves set upon once again by these foul beasts. Sum up:
Dale uses bonfire! It's somewhat effective!
Tesla builts a burning shitstick, made from miscellanious things from the goblin lavatory, and lugs it at a goblin, splashing shit and some fire on him.
Balsa does what Balsa does best.
Drusilla is the queen of misses and critfails. 

Afterwards, the party finds a pouch of kanis (iceinnamon) and a shitfilled bag of holding in the goblin lavatory. They also manage to knock out the shitstained goblin and Drusilla contemplates making him her slave.

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Frostlovers - The Key
aka The Ogre That Identified As A Giraffe

The party, having been stuck inside the cave after the avalance, set off down towards Frost. They were joined by Kent, the newly christened Bahamut-believer and Rago, a not-so-excited companion. Chief left the party to be on his own for a while. After arriving in Frost, the party told Lidda to get ready to leave. They then met with Bharsh, who scolded them for not retrieving the lockbox, and told them to come back when they did. Bharsh also complained about a thief having stolen money from him.

The party took their chance and distracted the manservant, which enabled Lia, the monk, to steal a bottle of wine and the manservant's dentures. They the left Frost in company with Lidda and Kent, Rago stayed behind. 

The party decided to go where the key pointed – south west. They soon came to the end of the snow, where summer met winter. From cold to the bones to warm as a summer's evening, the party followed the path until they encountered 2 ogres arguing. Kent took the lead and tried banishing them in the name of Bahamut. The ogres got angry.

The fight was brutal, a lot of hammers were swung, some spells were thrown, and people got knocked out, and then resuscitated. The most odd thing, though, happened when our beloved wild magic sorcerer managed to provoke a wild magic surge – one of the ogres had his body contort into the form of a giraffe, while still looking like an ogre. This enraged the ogreiaffe and almost killed our Hoppsan, but they managed to defeat the ogres. 

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Frostlovers - The Boar
aka The Time the Party Faced the Wererats

The party had just defeated the two ogres, one of which had been turned into an ogreaffe. As they were trying to cut the head of the ogreaffe, Chief returned to the party. They all set out on the path towards Fool's March together.

After making camp near a small river, which waters were almost freezing, Lia, the wood-elf monk, and Mikael, the human cleric, decided to hunt, seperately. Mikael came back empty handed.

Lia, on the other hand, accidentally came into a fight with a very angry giant boar who thought that Lia was a danger to her children. After Lia ran away back to camp, she recruited Hoppsan, the gnome sorceress, and Chief, the goliath barbarian, to join her in hunting down the giant boar for food. The fight was soon over, with Chief having been gored a little bit too much. Lia captured one of the piglets and Cheif tried catching another, but accidentally chased it over a cliff. It died. 

Back at camp, the party feasted on the boar that Chief had dragged back. At night, they were set upon by wererats, and defeated them all. Lidda and Chief seem to feel weird and sick, though, which is odd.  

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Ludimus' Lads
aka Gary (thinks he) Goes to Skallervall

The party contains three members, which are:

Gary, the human wizard, apprentice to Ludimus Leagallow.

Meamak, the goliath barbarian, he is what he needs to be.

Enkil, the dwarf fighter, of the Longstone family.

Gary had recruited Meamak and Enkil after Ludimus' request. They had entered Ludimus's study, had been interviewed by him and shown a special blue gem that could record what it heard. Ludimus explained to the party that he wanted them to explore and help people, and in return, he would pay them. The party agreed, and then helped Ludimus clear the clattered room of debris. 

When they were done, Ludimus summoned a portal in the middle of the clatter-free circle. As soon as the party had entered, Gary got a bad feeling about the place that they had teleported to – he thought that it was Skallervall, the village that every parent in the Kingdom of Stallon threatens to send their children to if they're naughty. Apparently, the village of Skallervall is filled with crazy people. Gary was instantly nervous and did not want to enter the village, but his newfound friends convinced him. 

As they entered the village, which was named Vilsten (Reststone), they quickly spotted the local tavern and entered. Inside, they exchanged words with the owner, and learned that Dinna is the current village elder. Meamak ordered food for everyone, and the party requested beds. 

The party sat and ate at the closest table. They socialized with the people there, Meamak challenged one of the them to a contest (the mad chickened out) and Gary failed at flirting.  The party also learned that Evina, the villages true elder, was missing. Dinna then entered the tavern, the party traded some words with her, when the mad that had chickened out slammed open the door to the tavern, screaming "They're coming!".

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Innkeepers - Bahamut Matata
aka That Time That Drusilla Tried Her Best at Dentistry

Tesla left the goblin cave, claiming that she had business to attend to in Smallbell. Balsa released the goblin covered in shit, which promised to be good. It lied. 

The goblin ran to rally his friends, and the party decided to make a trap – by putting wooden tables in their own way and setting them on fire. Soon enough, both Dale and Drusilla had fallen unconscious due to the heat, but Balsa managed to drag them to safety, one by one. When he came back and dragged out Dale, he saw the leader of the goblins, Dukk, having his foul dagger at Drusilla's throat. Balsa used his Dust of Disappearance to make himself, Dale, Drusilla and Dukk invisible. In the ensuing chaos, he dragged out Dale, backstabbed a hobgoblin, intimidated the other goblins into a fearful run, and was faced with Dukk, who once again had his dagger at Drusilla's throat. Dale had woken up, and was entering the cave again. Drusilla too woke up.

During the second fight, as Balsa came close to Dukk, Dukk slit Drusilla's throat. She almost died, but was saved by Balsa and Dale after they had killed Dukk. They took his dagger, which had given Drusilla a nasty, dark blue scar across her throat.

They searched the rest of the cave, found a loot of treasure, and rescued Earbender, a dragonborn child from the Norixius clan. She was grateful and accompanied the party out and back to Smallbell.

Once the party was back and had reported their victory over the goblins, the village once again threw a party in their honor. Balsa chugged his first mead, and immediately fell unconscious. Dale partied on and Drusilla slept under the ogre statue outside. When morning came, Balsa decided to see who the paintings that they had found in the goblin den belonged to. After asking around, he learned that Lord Jezagai was the owner of the nearby lands and could be the rightful owner. He was turned down at the gates, though, and was told that the paintings did not belong to Jezagai. He also learned that Jezagai had a sick daughter.

While Balsa was away, Drusilla decided to try to sneak up upon the bandits once again. As had happened the day before, she failed, was found, and was told to leave. She then gathered her party, and in a very furious manner, asked them nicely to help her kill the bandits. The party went to the bandit camp, and after a very exciting battle, managed to defeat the bandits. They also saved a hostage, named Maewenn, who told them that she was from Vilsten (Reststone) and that she was out traveling. If they ever needed a place to stay, they could stay in the tavern in Vilsten for free, since she knew the owner. She said to ask for her or Evina, the village elder.

Drusilla stayed back for a while after Dale and Balsa had left the bandit camp with Maewenn. Drusilla pulled out a few of the bandit leader's teeth and is on her was to make it into a charm. 

Back at Smallbell, Balsa turned in the only bandit they had knocked out, then left for the Duskbreakers. Dale, Drusilla and Tesla is still in Smallbell. 

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Innkeepers - Squirrels, Fire!
Aka That Time That Tesla Gained A New Friend

Our heroes had split up for about a week, each one going about their own personal business. Tesla had been taught in the ways of the College of Lore, Drusilla had been shown how to craft her own totem and Dale had been pretending to drink alcohol while also realizing he was now a more powerful sorcerer. Our dear Balsa, ready to ascend to his rightful place as a paladin, was still at the Duskbreakers.

The party had been asked, repeatedly, to go and get the final ingredient needed to start up the mead-making again – the enchanted water that could only be found in the northern forest, in a magical fountain. The party gathered up their things, Alenn, and then set out on their journey.

When they arrived at the outskirts of the forest, Alenn told the party that he would wait for them there. The party continued into the forest, following a small stream that would soon lead them to the fountain. When they arrived, they saw animals of different species, each one represented by a larger individual from every species. They were greeted by an owl, who was resting on the head of a moose. The owl told the party that if they wanted to take something from the forest, they had to give something to the forest. The owl also mentioned that "giving" to the forest could mean giving help. When asked, the owl mentioned foul orcs that ravaged and polluted the forest. Our brave heroes, bloodthirsty as they are, knew what to do.

They were lead to the orcs by a large squirrel, who kept picking up nuts. Tesla crafted a small backpack to the squirrel, who was very thankful, and kept his nuts in it. One could say that he proudly carried his sack of nuts.

When they came close to the orcs, the squirrel pointed at the orcs' camp and scurried up into a nearby tree. A fight soon broke out, which was very bloody, with orcs being pummeled, thrown nuts at, bitten by squirrels and generally being miserable. Tesla managed to use Charm Person on the orcs' leader, Bolgok, and then persuaded him that they were all friends. Bolgok helped in finishing up the rest of the orcs, and then agreed to leave the forest. When he did, the larger squirrel shook his head. Drusilla used her Speak to Animals, and the squirrel explained that they needed the orcs dead, all of them. The squirrel then helped the party to lure the orc back. He was promptly killed.

During the fight, Dale tried using a nut that a squirrel was holding on to as a projectile for his spells. The squirrel held on tight, but was rescued and picked out of the air by Drusilla. The squirrel is now a constant companion of Drusillas.

The party returned, they gained the water, and left. When they came back to Smallbell, they villagers were approving of their return with the water, but no one was happy. News had come that the lord of the land's daughter's sickness had grown worse, and that the lord was refusing help. The party was asked to help the village sneak in an antidote that Martin could make, and in return, they would get free mead for their inn.  

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Ludimus' Lads - Orcs!
Aka Meamak Has To Do All The Hard Work

Our great heroes, having been warned that "they" are coming, rushed out to help as well as they could. What they saw was a village besieged by orcs. The party fought hard, chased orcs and rescued children! In the end, when the last orc was slain, the party saw dark and mysterious hooded figure watching them. 

The hooded figure raised its hands, and all the fallen orcs, soldiers and villagers arose as undead. 

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